Loss (Apollo, part 2)

February 27, 2013 in Blog

After her first day back following Apollo’s death, Isobel said she had a “rough day” at school today because people asked her questions she didn’t like. Like, why did Apollo have to die. And why does she have a green feather in her hair (that’s unrelated – she’s a punk rock girl). I told her that she can always tell people she isn’t ready to talk about something or that it’s personal. I asked if she had any questions she would like to ask me. She, of course, asked “why did Apollo have to die?” And this is what I said…

You remember that he was very very old. In the cycle of life everything that is living must eventually die. It makes room for new life, new love and it reminds us to appreciate what we have that is most important. For me, that’s the relationships we have with the people we love the most. We all get caught up at times with stuff we want and other such silliness from time to time. But those are just things and clutter and now we remember what really matters.

It’s because of sadness that we get the gift of fully appreciating joy. These don’t just coexist. They have a symbiotic relationship. They aren’t mutually exclusive, they’re necessary complements.

My friend told me later that that would be wonderful to share with other children who experience loss since they’d have the same question. I laughed. Children? I chuckled… Hell, Chris had the same question. He told me just today. In fact, in answering Isobel’s question I was answering the same for myself.

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